In a new book by Brian Tracy and Christina Stein, Kiss That Frog, the negative thoughts that influence attitudes and behaviors are analyzed. Michael McKinney offers a great summary of the top five factors listed in the book:
- Justification: You defend your negativity and your right to be angry. Negative emotions cannot exist unless you can justify your right to experience them to yourself and others. The more you justify yourself and convince yourself that the other person involved is bad in some way, that you are pure and innocent and are therefore entitled to feel the way you do, the angrier and more upset you become.
- Identification: This means that you take things personally. You interpret what has happened as a personal attack on you. Having healthy emotional boundaries is essential, especially in a work environment. You can be compassionate without identifying with someone else’s emotions.
- Hypersensitivity: To be extremely sensitive to the thoughts, opinions, or attitudes of others toward you. Peter Ouspensky called it “inward considering.” In extreme cases, hypersensitive people become paralyzed in that they cannot make a decision without getting the approval of other people.
- Judgmentalism: The tendency of people to make negative assessments about others. When you judge another, you become emotional. An emotions distort evaluations. People often judge other because they want to control their behavior.
- Rationalization: What happens when you put a socially acceptable explanation on an an otherwise socially unacceptable act. Because of low self-esteem and weak egos, most people cannot admit that they have done or said something that was not thoroughly reasonable and justified.
Read the original post from Leadership Now blog: http://www.leadershipnow.com/leadingblog/2012/02/5_leadership_lessons_where_neg.html#.T1b5azpsFpE.email